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60 Funniest Monday Jokes to Make Your Colleagues Laugh

Are you as sick of Mondays as we are? Maybe some jokes about Monday will cheer you up! Take a look at some of the best Monday jokes & memes that are currently available. Many of these jokes insult Mondays, but you might not laugh if you actually enjoy Mondays!

One day on Venus lasts 5,832 hours. The same as one Monday on Earth.

The shortest horror story is called: “Monday.”

I’m financially set for life… providing I die next Monday.

If Monday were shoes, they’d be crocs.

If every day is a gift, I want to know where I can return Mondays. Store credit will do, I’ll exchange it for another Saturday.

The only thing worse than Friday the 13th is Monday the 13th. It’s a much spookier day.

Tuesday through Sunday are okay, but Monday is the week link.

“I’m not coming out of the house until Monday is over!”

If Monday had a face, I would punch it. Punch it all the way into next week.

I really need a day in-between Sunday and Monday. Make every weekend a three-day weekend and Mondays won’t seem so bad.

Due to a lack of interest. Monday has been canceled.

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, I blinked, Monday. The weekend goes by way too fast.

“Hello Monday, can I ask you a question? Why are you always back so quickly? Do you not have a hobby?

Monday really needs something to keep itself busy so we don’t have to see it.”

What day of the week are demons most tired? De-Monday.

Monday is an awful way to spend one-seventh of your life. Imagine if we had two Mondays every week!

I think I’m allergic to Monday.

Maybe Monday doesn’t like you either.

Monday checklist: coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee.

Sunday and Monday are in a fight. Who wins?
Sunday. Monday is a weekday.

Why was the broom late for school on Monday? He over-swept!

What do kids do on Mondays during vacation? The same thing they do every other day!

Are you ready for Monday? Not.

Monday should be optional.

Good morning. Keep calm and pretend it’s not Monday

I like Tuesday simply because it is the furthest from next Monday it can possibly be.

On what day do ghosts do their howling? Moan-day!

How did the hen feel on Monday? Eggshausted!

Why was the acid always in a bad mood on a Monday morning? He was an a-mean-o acid!

What day of the week are demons most tired? De-Monday!

Why was the root vegetable so happy on Monday? He was up-beet!

Why was Sunday afraid of Monday? Because Monday threw Friday!

Why did the cat have to stay at home from school on Monday? He wasn’t feline very well!

What subject did the snake learn in school on Monday? Hiss-tory!

What is the best way to describe Monday? Monday-ne!

Why was the broom late for school on Monday? He over-swept!

What do you call an ant that sells medicine from Monday to Friday, and helps a farmer on the weekend? A farmassistant!

What happened to the witches who broke the school rules on Monday? They got ex-spelled!

What did the elf learn at school on Monday this week? The elf-abet!

How did the bees get to school on Monday? By school-buzz!

Where did the music teacher leave her keys on Monday? In the piano!

Which day of the week makes werewolves howl? Moonday!

What do you call someone who is pleased on a Monday? Unemployed.

Why are Mondays and Tuesdays the most productive days of the week? Because after that it is WTF.

What do you call Mondays when there aren’t any zoom meetings? Meetless Mondays.

What’s long, hard, and waiting for you? Monday and it’s just around the corner.

Why was Sunday afraid of Monday? The reason is because Monday through Friday.

How is Monday similar to a math problem? Add the Irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problem, and divide the happiness.

Why doesn’t Gordon Ramsay enjoy WWE on Monday nights? Because it is RAW.

Why shouldn’t you be sad on Monday? Because 48 hours ago, it was a sadder day.

Why do people love Tuesdays? Because it is the farthest one can get from Mondays.

What do you call a sundae that melts away and turns into garbage? Monday.

What’s worse than a rainy Friday? A sunny Monday.

Why were Mondays created? To punish us for the things we did over the weekend.

“How much is one day on Venus? It is 5,832 hours on Earth which is the same as a Monday on Earth.

Why was the corrupt calendar locked up at the start of the week? It was Monday laundering.

What makes a blonde laugh on a Monday? Anything unless you tell the joke on Tuesday.

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