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60 Great Nicknames or Insults for Your Friends

Group of friends.

If you are like me, you may have had times when you’ve forgotten someone’s name. Maybe it happened the next morning when you wake up with a stranger or even at a social gathering barely 5 minutes after being introduced to someone. Thank god for nicknames!

We all create them, and it serves us well. Nicknames immediately give us pertinent information about someone that their birth name cannot. Nicknames can be positive like ‘The Italian Stallion’ or negative like ‘Dragon Breath’.

People painting and laughing.

Keep in mind that nicknames aren’t limited to humans. They can be used for people, places and things. We’ve put together some of the funniest and most clever nicknames around and we’re confident you will understand all of them. If not, we’ve already reserved a few nicknames for YOU: Birdbrain, Professor Dimwit, Covid Head. Test them out, just put “Thank you” in front of each of them and see how they sound!

*** IMPORTANT: Discrimination toward people may create significant consequences for their well-being – the jokes on this page are meant to be in good fun – please always remain respectful ***

Chicken and egg image.
Kevin Spacey image.
Nicolas Cage image.
Calamity Jane image.

My colleagues nicknamed me Mr. Compromise.
I neither love it or hate it.
I like it.

What’s the most heartless nickname you can give a person that has diabetes?
Sugar Pie.

He had his coke dealer saved in his contacts.
He was listed as Nosy.

Eminem image.

What would you call an uninteresting woman?
Mary Tyler Bore

Taylor Swift image.

What do you call someone who is not quick and not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
Cinder Blockhead

***Jurassic Love***

Old couple sitting together.
Elmer's glue bottle.

The name of the new worker is Amanda Victoria.
Forming a friendly, casual relationship with her colleagues was Manda Tory.

The mature couple went on their honeymoon and the wife nicknamed her husband Snapchat. He only lasted 10 seconds.

Al Sharpton image.

My mom nicknamed my dad placenta.
After I was born, he was never seen again.

Man who constantly makes mistakes.
Aaron Error

Dog reading book image.
Old lady covering mouth image.
Google page image.

A guy with the nickname E loaned me money. Now when I see him I say, “A E I O U. “
He responds, “Y don’t you pay me sometime?!”

My wife’s nick name is Liz which means her Nicholasname is Elizabeth.

heady murphy nickname

Castro’s secretary discreetly put his colonoscopy appointment on his calendar.
It was noted as ‘The In Fidel‘.

What type of travel would you have with a bewildered woman?
Disorient Express

Bette Midler image.
Man falling down stairs.

Why did people nickname Cersei’s children The Wonder Kids?
Because they were in bread.

***Leave and let Leave***
An old friend of mine was always down on his luck. We nicknamed him leaves. Eventually, he ended up in the gutter.

What do do you call a rock star whose moves can even bring chaos to the atmosphere.
Tina Turbulent

What do you call someone who is lazy and needs help when sitting on the toilet?

Moses image.
Kitten image.
Boxer in ring image.

What do you call a friend who is perpetually sleepy?
Slumber Jack

What do you call a Florida person when they divulge a secret?
Blabber South!

What do you call your friend who forever speaks in riddles?
Teller from the cryptic.

My great grandfather was a former military leader from the U.S.S.R. who was exiled to Siberia.
They called him “Popsickle

Tree sap image.
Magician image.

Someone whose hair is just not put together.
Sloppy Joe!

What do you call a florist who is perpetually in a state of confusion.
Daisy Dazed

What do you call an archery expert who will easily obey anyone?
A bowman

What would you call a woman that likes to use fancy words, but fails to use them correctly.
Patty Pompous

What do you call a woman who doesn’t make sense whenever she speaks?
Greta Garble

What you call a politician who’s really stupid?
Donald Chump

What do you call a cold man who’s a bit flighty, has a head full of non-related ideas and can’t concentrate on one thing before losing attention.
Frosty Flaky

Virgin Mary image.
Old woman thinking.

***Pop Culture Nicknames***
Famous actor who loved teasing people.
Mock Hudson

What would you call the thinnest lumberjack?

What classic sitcom would your nerdiest friends most enjoy watching?
Dork & Mindy

Someone who smirks at their only jokes?
Ricky Smiley

Peter Parker crying.

What do you call a friend who believes everything a tour guide says?
Gullible’s Travels

What do you call a friend who fumes after reading children books?
Furious George

What’s a good nickname for someone who is not very smart and is a bit of a ditz?
Aaron Airhead

A trendy friend who always has jokes to tell.
Hipster Quipster

What nickname did the woman give to her battery operated toy?
The Love Machine

What would you call a woman with strange habits?
Harper Bizarre

My girlfriend was feeling self-conscious about her big breasts due to lacation so I gave her an endearing nickname to cheer her up.
Unfortunately, she didn’t care to be called Lady Lactose

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