If you are like me, you may have had times when you’ve forgotten someone’s name. Maybe it happened the next morning when you wake up with a stranger or even at a social gathering barely 5 minutes after being introduced to someone. Thank god for nicknames!
We all create them, and it serves us well. Nicknames immediately give us pertinent information about someone that their birth name cannot. Nicknames can be positive like ‘The Italian Stallion’ or negative like ‘Dragon Breath’.
Keep in mind that nicknames aren’t limited to humans. They can be used for people, places and things. We’ve put together some of the funniest and most clever nicknames around and we’re confident you will understand all of them. If not, we’ve already reserved a few nicknames for YOU: Birdbrain, Professor Dimwit, Covid Head. Test them out, just put “Thank you” in front of each of them and see how they sound!
*** IMPORTANT: Discrimination toward people may create significant consequences for their well-being – the jokes on this page are meant to be in good fun – please always remain respectful ***
My colleagues nicknamed me Mr. Compromise.
I neither love it or hate it.
I like it.
What’s the most heartless nickname you can give a person that has diabetes?
He had his coke dealer saved in his contacts.
He was listed as Nosy.
What would you call an uninteresting woman?
Mary Tyler Bore
What do you call someone who is not quick and not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
The name of the new worker is Amanda Victoria.
Forming a friendly, casual relationship with her colleagues was Manda Tory.
The mature couple went on their honeymoon and the wife nicknamed her husband Snapchat. He only lasted 10 seconds.
My mom nicknamed my dad placenta.
After I was born, he was never seen again.
Man who constantly makes mistakes.
A guy with the nickname E loaned me money. Now when I see him I say, “A E I O U. “
He responds, “Y don’t you pay me sometime?!”
My wife’s nick name is Liz which means her Nicholasname is Elizabeth.
Castro’s secretary discreetly put his colonoscopy appointment on his calendar.
It was noted as ‘The In Fidel‘.
What type of travel would you have with a bewildered woman?
Why did people nickname Cersei’s children The Wonder Kids?
Because they were in bread.
***Leave and let Leave***
An old friend of mine was always down on his luck. We nicknamed him leaves. Eventually, he ended up in the gutter.
What do do you call a rock star whose moves can even bring chaos to the atmosphere.
What do you call someone who is lazy and needs help when sitting on the toilet?
What do you call a friend who is perpetually sleepy?
What do you call a Florida person when they divulge a secret?
What do you call your friend who forever speaks in riddles?
Teller from the cryptic.
My great grandfather was a former military leader from the U.S.S.R. who was exiled to Siberia.
They called him “Popsickle“
Someone whose hair is just not put together.
What do you call a florist who is perpetually in a state of confusion.
What do you call an archery expert who will easily obey anyone?
What would you call a woman that likes to use fancy words, but fails to use them correctly.
What do you call a woman who doesn’t make sense whenever she speaks?
What you call a politician who’s really stupid?
What do you call a cold man who’s a bit flighty, has a head full of non-related ideas and can’t concentrate on one thing before losing attention.
***Pop Culture Nicknames***
Famous actor who loved teasing people.
What would you call the thinnest lumberjack?
What classic sitcom would your nerdiest friends most enjoy watching?
Dork & Mindy
Someone who smirks at their only jokes?
What do you call a friend who believes everything a tour guide says?
What do you call a friend who fumes after reading children books?
What’s a good nickname for someone who is not very smart and is a bit of a ditz?
A trendy friend who always has jokes to tell.
What nickname did the woman give to her battery operated toy?
The Love Machine
What would you call a woman with strange habits?
My girlfriend was feeling self-conscious about her big breasts due to lacation so I gave her an endearing nickname to cheer her up.
Unfortunately, she didn’t care to be called Lady Lactose